David Roppo asked:
According to the National Enquirer Lindsay Lohan is “out of control” when it comes to drugs and alcohol. The National Enquirer is now claiming that a friend of Lindsay’s told the publication that despite having a month in rehab earlier in the year, the actress went wild at the recent Coachella music festival: “Lindsay’s drugging and drinking is out of control! She learned nothing in rehab.”
In an article published by Vanity Fair Magazine Lindsay Lohan had finally come clean on rumors about her incredibly shrinking body, by admitting that her low body weight was due to bulimia.
It would seem from the above-mentioned publications that Ms. Lohan is not only suffering from a drug addiction, but also an eating disorder! One would have to wonder what causes someone that has captured fame and fortune to suddenly fall prey to the trap of addiction?
Well, lets take a moment to examine Lindsay’s upbringing!
Lindsay’s former bodyguard Tony Almeida was quoted in the latest issue of In Touch as stating; If Lindsay Lohan’s life is a train wreck, she’s got no one to blame but her parents. “Lindsay was a very sweet and talented kid, but she didn’t stand a chance against her parents and the Hollywood system,” he told the magazine.
Sex, drugs and ******* attempts — according to Tony, Lindsay tried it all while underage and under the neglectful watch of her legal guardians, Mom and Dad, the story reports. Even when her soon-to-be absentee daddy, Michael, did pay attention to Lindsay’s bad behavior, the punishment was worse than the crime.
Annoyed with Lindsay’s late-night whining, the magazine reports that “Michael slammed on the brakes and dragged her out of the car, pushed her up on the hood, screamed at her and called her a ****,” Tony recalls. “I got in the middle of it and pulled him off.”
Like the stand-up dad he is, Michael claims ignorance of the incident. Still, Pops Lohan told In Touch, “If I did do it, if that’s the worst anyone can say about me, then it’s not too bad.” Now that’s fatherly advice you can take to rehab.
Meanwhile, mom Dina often “let her do whatever she wanted, just to keep her happy and working . . . [At her 16th birthday party] Lindsay drank whatever she wanted – I saw her drinking beer and mixed drinks with my own eyes [without Dina's intervention].” As Lindsay’s manager, Dina – who was desperate to become a star herself – received 10 percent of her income. “Lindsay was the family cash cow – and she resented it,” Almeida claims. “They counted on her to pay their bills . . . I saw Lindsay exhausted, begging her mother for some time off.” Young Lindsay’s parents looked the other way as she began a life of boozing, boys and drugs. When she was 15, they allowed her to share a room with her then-14-year-old boyfriend, Aaron Carter, at Loews in Miami Beach. Almeida relates, “They knew Lindsay was sleeping in Aaron’s room. But they seemed happy she had chosen somebody who could benefit her singing career.”
It is quite apparent that a whole host of dysfunctional patterns took place in the Lohan household. Both parents were obviously uninvolved in Lindsay’s life, and at times were verbally abusive, and inadequetly parented their children.
I am not at all surprised that Lindsay has fallen prey to not one but two addictions since the emotional pain caused by family dysfunction is at the root of all addictive behavior.
Are you suffering from addiction?
When you were a child, did your parents verbally abuse you? Were you physically or sexually abused? Did one or both of your parents suffer from alcoholism or drug abuse? Did your parents control or manipulate you? Did your parents show up part-time for a job that required full time parenting? Like most, you may not realize how much these family dysfunctions have destroyed your self-esteem or why they are the root cause of your addiction! You see, there are many types of addictions, and they all have the same common denominator’ family dysfunction!
As a life coach, I have helped addicted clients learn the secrets to overcoming addiction, and I have established a unique five-step process as a potential benchmark for recovery. My success has overwhelmingly convinced me that the mainstream approach to addiction is fundamentally amiss because formal treatment programs attempt to defeat the symptoms rather than address the core issue.
Addictive behavior is a symptom of the emotional trauma caused by family dysfunction. Therefore, when you fix the root of the problem habitual behavior becomes repulsive. Instead, the mainstream philosophy has followed a pattern of bombarding the public with multiple theories and confusing psychobabble, neither of which address liberation from family dysfunction nor restoring self-esteem. These treatments not only fail to preserve anonymity, but they also fail in excess of ninety percent of the time!
The following is a brief outline of the 5 steps to addiction freedom. Prior to following these steps or any addiction recovery program, take the necessary time to ascertain whether you require the additional support of an addiction counselor or medical attention regarding withdrawal.
1. Step One: Unearth the Square Root
Family dysfunction is the common denominator, or square root of all addictive behavior, and until it is brought to the forefront and confronted nothing will change! This is by far the most important and critical step of the entire process. There are two parts to step one, and they are as follows:
A. Uncovering your family dysfunction
Physical abuse
Sexual abuse
Verbal abuse
Alcoholic parent
Inadequate parenting
B. Confront the parent or parents responsible for the dysfunction
The thought of confronting the person that is responsible for your emotional trauma is one the most frightening situations you will face. However, it is also the most liberating and empowering thing you’ll ever do! Why do you need to confront your parent or parents? Well, first let me clarify the meaning of the word confront and in what context we are using this term. Confronting the person does not at all mean that you should verbally attack them for your misfortunes. On the contrary, you are not doing this for them. You are doing it for you! The confrontation is not meant to be an attack, but it is rather a chance for you to set the record straight and drop the emotional baggage that you’ve been toting around.
2. Step Two: Remove your Emotional Baggage
You have completed step one and have confronted your parent or parents. This in and of itself will have removed much of the pain and emotional trauma. However, to fully free yourself from their emotional stronghold, it will be necessary to find forgiveness in your heart for a family member that has committed an atrocity against you. Forgive! How can I forgive someone that committed these atrocities against me? Many people have a misconception about forgiveness. Forgiveness is not reconciliation! There is a drastic difference between the two. Reconciliation would mean that you have accepted and submit to their behavior and have agreed to try and continue the relationship under those circumstances. Forgiveness means that you merely give up or cease the resentment of the offender.
Step Three: Cure Wounditis
Without question, partaking in habitual behavior not only causes you pain but, it inflicts pain on the people around you as well. However, do not allow what you have done in the past or what others have done to you, to cause you to live in fear of what the future holds. The past is the past, it is over, and living in it does not serve anyone well. Live in the present moment, be kind to yourself, and learn to love yourself. How can you love someone else if you don’t love yourself? The answer is you can’t!!! It isn’t a big secret that you’re feeling shame and guilt for what you’ve done. In fact, you’re probably questioning right now as to whether you should be punished for your past actions. Well guess what, its ok! God doesn’t punish people, we punish ourselves. God is a loving and forgiving being. So if you thought that you would continue to punish yourself with shame and guilt before God gets a hold of you, you can stop right now! We do not have defects of character, are not full of shortcomings, and we certainly are not powerless! On the Contrary, we are all the same, we are all connected, and we all have the same power to change!
Step Four: Awaken the Power within
Whether you want to admit it or not, all of the pain you have been through concerning your habitual behavior is a spiritual lesson. And until you view it as such, it will continue to cause you suffering and unhappiness. Every dark cloud does have a silver lining, and if you look hard enough you’ll find one in this habitual situation too. However, to find that silver lining you must ask the right questions;
1. What can I learn from my addiction?
2. How can I grow from it?
The answers to these questions can be found in a place that is uncharted by most, and it is just waiting to be explored! It’s called your true self! To embark on a journey of Self -reflection requires the practice of Mediation.
For more information on mediation you can visit my website below.
Step five: Practice Acts of Random Kindness
Happiness is a state of mind. Individuals that are suffering from addictive behavior are not happy! Ironically, in an attempt to find happiness, they chose a vehicle to mask their emotional pain through the use of alcohol, illicit drugs, and various other compulsions. However, happiness is never found on the outside in material possessions or in the abuse of substances and compulsions! True life happiness can only be found in one place, and that place is within! Happiness is not found in the practice of outward ideals or in other people. To the contrary, it is actually the small acts of random kindness that opens the heart and fuels the principle of unconditional love!
To practice spirituality is to be of service to your fellow man and make no mistake about it that is why we are all here. Begin with small acts of kindness such as opening a door for someone, letting someone go before you in the checkout line or just taking the time to offer a kind word to an older person or a child. You get the picture! The first thing I do upon waking in the morning is think of how I can be of service and throughout the day I am always mindful of opportunities that present themselves for me to do just that. You know, the paradox of the whole thing is that the more kind and generous you are the more love, kindness and abundance you’ll receive back. Don’t believe me! Just try it and watch what begins to happen to you.
Finally, good luck in your quest for addiction freedom. Visit my website below to subscribe to my Free E-guide and Weekly E-Zine;
overcome Addiction
Best Wishes,
David Roppo
Addiction Coach
Onetoo3 – Members-Only Content for WordPress
According to the National Enquirer Lindsay Lohan is “out of control” when it comes to drugs and alcohol. The National Enquirer is now claiming that a friend of Lindsay’s told the publication that despite having a month in rehab earlier in the year, the actress went wild at the recent Coachella music festival: “Lindsay’s drugging and drinking is out of control! She learned nothing in rehab.”
In an article published by Vanity Fair Magazine Lindsay Lohan had finally come clean on rumors about her incredibly shrinking body, by admitting that her low body weight was due to bulimia.
It would seem from the above-mentioned publications that Ms. Lohan is not only suffering from a drug addiction, but also an eating disorder! One would have to wonder what causes someone that has captured fame and fortune to suddenly fall prey to the trap of addiction?
Well, lets take a moment to examine Lindsay’s upbringing!
Lindsay’s former bodyguard Tony Almeida was quoted in the latest issue of In Touch as stating; If Lindsay Lohan’s life is a train wreck, she’s got no one to blame but her parents. “Lindsay was a very sweet and talented kid, but she didn’t stand a chance against her parents and the Hollywood system,” he told the magazine.
Sex, drugs and ******* attempts — according to Tony, Lindsay tried it all while underage and under the neglectful watch of her legal guardians, Mom and Dad, the story reports. Even when her soon-to-be absentee daddy, Michael, did pay attention to Lindsay’s bad behavior, the punishment was worse than the crime.
Annoyed with Lindsay’s late-night whining, the magazine reports that “Michael slammed on the brakes and dragged her out of the car, pushed her up on the hood, screamed at her and called her a ****,” Tony recalls. “I got in the middle of it and pulled him off.”
Like the stand-up dad he is, Michael claims ignorance of the incident. Still, Pops Lohan told In Touch, “If I did do it, if that’s the worst anyone can say about me, then it’s not too bad.” Now that’s fatherly advice you can take to rehab.
Meanwhile, mom Dina often “let her do whatever she wanted, just to keep her happy and working . . . [At her 16th birthday party] Lindsay drank whatever she wanted – I saw her drinking beer and mixed drinks with my own eyes [without Dina's intervention].” As Lindsay’s manager, Dina – who was desperate to become a star herself – received 10 percent of her income. “Lindsay was the family cash cow – and she resented it,” Almeida claims. “They counted on her to pay their bills . . . I saw Lindsay exhausted, begging her mother for some time off.” Young Lindsay’s parents looked the other way as she began a life of boozing, boys and drugs. When she was 15, they allowed her to share a room with her then-14-year-old boyfriend, Aaron Carter, at Loews in Miami Beach. Almeida relates, “They knew Lindsay was sleeping in Aaron’s room. But they seemed happy she had chosen somebody who could benefit her singing career.”
It is quite apparent that a whole host of dysfunctional patterns took place in the Lohan household. Both parents were obviously uninvolved in Lindsay’s life, and at times were verbally abusive, and inadequetly parented their children.
I am not at all surprised that Lindsay has fallen prey to not one but two addictions since the emotional pain caused by family dysfunction is at the root of all addictive behavior.
Are you suffering from addiction?
When you were a child, did your parents verbally abuse you? Were you physically or sexually abused? Did one or both of your parents suffer from alcoholism or drug abuse? Did your parents control or manipulate you? Did your parents show up part-time for a job that required full time parenting? Like most, you may not realize how much these family dysfunctions have destroyed your self-esteem or why they are the root cause of your addiction! You see, there are many types of addictions, and they all have the same common denominator’ family dysfunction!
As a life coach, I have helped addicted clients learn the secrets to overcoming addiction, and I have established a unique five-step process as a potential benchmark for recovery. My success has overwhelmingly convinced me that the mainstream approach to addiction is fundamentally amiss because formal treatment programs attempt to defeat the symptoms rather than address the core issue.
Addictive behavior is a symptom of the emotional trauma caused by family dysfunction. Therefore, when you fix the root of the problem habitual behavior becomes repulsive. Instead, the mainstream philosophy has followed a pattern of bombarding the public with multiple theories and confusing psychobabble, neither of which address liberation from family dysfunction nor restoring self-esteem. These treatments not only fail to preserve anonymity, but they also fail in excess of ninety percent of the time!
The following is a brief outline of the 5 steps to addiction freedom. Prior to following these steps or any addiction recovery program, take the necessary time to ascertain whether you require the additional support of an addiction counselor or medical attention regarding withdrawal.
1. Step One: Unearth the Square Root
Family dysfunction is the common denominator, or square root of all addictive behavior, and until it is brought to the forefront and confronted nothing will change! This is by far the most important and critical step of the entire process. There are two parts to step one, and they are as follows:
A. Uncovering your family dysfunction
Physical abuse
Sexual abuse
Verbal abuse
Alcoholic parent
Inadequate parenting
B. Confront the parent or parents responsible for the dysfunction
The thought of confronting the person that is responsible for your emotional trauma is one the most frightening situations you will face. However, it is also the most liberating and empowering thing you’ll ever do! Why do you need to confront your parent or parents? Well, first let me clarify the meaning of the word confront and in what context we are using this term. Confronting the person does not at all mean that you should verbally attack them for your misfortunes. On the contrary, you are not doing this for them. You are doing it for you! The confrontation is not meant to be an attack, but it is rather a chance for you to set the record straight and drop the emotional baggage that you’ve been toting around.
2. Step Two: Remove your Emotional Baggage
You have completed step one and have confronted your parent or parents. This in and of itself will have removed much of the pain and emotional trauma. However, to fully free yourself from their emotional stronghold, it will be necessary to find forgiveness in your heart for a family member that has committed an atrocity against you. Forgive! How can I forgive someone that committed these atrocities against me? Many people have a misconception about forgiveness. Forgiveness is not reconciliation! There is a drastic difference between the two. Reconciliation would mean that you have accepted and submit to their behavior and have agreed to try and continue the relationship under those circumstances. Forgiveness means that you merely give up or cease the resentment of the offender.
Step Three: Cure Wounditis
Without question, partaking in habitual behavior not only causes you pain but, it inflicts pain on the people around you as well. However, do not allow what you have done in the past or what others have done to you, to cause you to live in fear of what the future holds. The past is the past, it is over, and living in it does not serve anyone well. Live in the present moment, be kind to yourself, and learn to love yourself. How can you love someone else if you don’t love yourself? The answer is you can’t!!! It isn’t a big secret that you’re feeling shame and guilt for what you’ve done. In fact, you’re probably questioning right now as to whether you should be punished for your past actions. Well guess what, its ok! God doesn’t punish people, we punish ourselves. God is a loving and forgiving being. So if you thought that you would continue to punish yourself with shame and guilt before God gets a hold of you, you can stop right now! We do not have defects of character, are not full of shortcomings, and we certainly are not powerless! On the Contrary, we are all the same, we are all connected, and we all have the same power to change!
Step Four: Awaken the Power within
Whether you want to admit it or not, all of the pain you have been through concerning your habitual behavior is a spiritual lesson. And until you view it as such, it will continue to cause you suffering and unhappiness. Every dark cloud does have a silver lining, and if you look hard enough you’ll find one in this habitual situation too. However, to find that silver lining you must ask the right questions;
1. What can I learn from my addiction?
2. How can I grow from it?
The answers to these questions can be found in a place that is uncharted by most, and it is just waiting to be explored! It’s called your true self! To embark on a journey of Self -reflection requires the practice of Mediation.
For more information on mediation you can visit my website below.
Step five: Practice Acts of Random Kindness
Happiness is a state of mind. Individuals that are suffering from addictive behavior are not happy! Ironically, in an attempt to find happiness, they chose a vehicle to mask their emotional pain through the use of alcohol, illicit drugs, and various other compulsions. However, happiness is never found on the outside in material possessions or in the abuse of substances and compulsions! True life happiness can only be found in one place, and that place is within! Happiness is not found in the practice of outward ideals or in other people. To the contrary, it is actually the small acts of random kindness that opens the heart and fuels the principle of unconditional love!
To practice spirituality is to be of service to your fellow man and make no mistake about it that is why we are all here. Begin with small acts of kindness such as opening a door for someone, letting someone go before you in the checkout line or just taking the time to offer a kind word to an older person or a child. You get the picture! The first thing I do upon waking in the morning is think of how I can be of service and throughout the day I am always mindful of opportunities that present themselves for me to do just that. You know, the paradox of the whole thing is that the more kind and generous you are the more love, kindness and abundance you’ll receive back. Don’t believe me! Just try it and watch what begins to happen to you.
Finally, good luck in your quest for addiction freedom. Visit my website below to subscribe to my Free E-guide and Weekly E-Zine;
overcome Addiction
Best Wishes,
David Roppo
Addiction Coach
Onetoo3 – Members-Only Content for WordPress
Related Websites -
Should You Keep Tolerating a Bad Marriage for the Sake of the Family? No, No, No! DO NOT STAY in your marriage 'for the sake of the children'. You are causing more pain for them when they become adults and you cannot see that right now. Staying in your relationship for the sake of your children causes your children much more distress...... -
Invest Your Money- Not Your Emotions Investing in your future is one of the best financial moves you can make. There is no argument that money well invested will serve you much better over time than the same cash equivalent placed in a traditional savings account or worse yet in a cookie jar. With that in...... -
The Mental and Behavioral Aspects of Making Change We all know that making change in our lives is both mental and behavioral in nature. Research has shown that in order to make even the most basic changes in our lives, a four step process is involved. The steps are to be positive, add support, make a gesture and...... - Squandering the Kids' Inheritance Are you planning on leaving an estate to your children? Are you hoping for an inheritance from your own family to help fund your retirement? Let's talk about this for a minute. On the subject of parents, kids, and inheritances, I found a short article from CNN/Money fascinating in its......
-
Paying off Debt in 9 Steps pt 2 Part two in the series on paying off debt: Throwing away your bills and shredding your credit card payment reminders simply is not going to make the problem go away. Debt is going to hover over you until you find a way to deal with it. Interest will continue to......
